Sheila moved to Nairobi in 1967 to be closer to Neville Chittick, her archaeologist lover. My parents’ marriage had broken down and she could not stand being with my coercive controlling father any longer. I write about him and their relationship in my book, The Boy from Boskovice: a father’s secret life. She had been on a dig with Neville at the back end of 1966, when I was ensconced in my boarding school, Godstowe.
Travelling to Pate by boat from Lamu with Neville, and shaving on the beach on Manda Toto
She had managed to get a job with FAO in the Range Management Programme, where she was mercilessly bullied by her male bosses, but befriended by the support staff, female like her.
She used this as a launch pad for a continuation of her chest business and, in line with her interests in culture, she began to collect tribal adornments and artefacts, much of which is now in the Exeter museum, although I still have some examples of the rarer items. When she returned to England in 1973, she used to arrange sales of some the less rare items in the Henley Town Hall.
I used to visit her most holidays. Around 1968/9 I made my first visit to Lamu which I loathed. There was no electricity, no cars and no Coke! We were with Neville and a motley gang of hangers on, and we all camped on the roof of one of the only guest houses – Kadaras, long gone, on the edge of the town, on the sea front on the way to Shela.
A few years later we went to Pate, a nearby island which she had excavated with Neville , and I remember a long walk to the old town from the only available landing point (due to the tidal creeks), several miles away, in blistering heat. Staying there overnight was extremely primitive – not only no electricity but no running water and the long drops were pretty unsavoury. These were the less good expeditions!
But she also used to take me camping and to national parks, in her white Renault 4. She was always hard up as my father gave her very little alimony, so all our travels were on the cheap. These were good times notwithstanding.
Nairobi memories – Mum looks drawn and worried but I’m happy enough with my kittens
We also used to travel down to Dar, as well as Zanzibar and Kilwa on one occasion; our old friends the Cadwalladers still lived there (he was Nyerere’s pilot) in our old road, Mzinga Way. Denise was my best friend and we always had fun especially when we were teenagers! We remain friends today!
In Dar with daughters of old Kilwa friends, Jyoti & Swati Dandekar
Travels with my mother 